Weird News: Beer thieves start strong, finish arrested, uninebriated – Palm Beach Post
Beer runners: Entering a store in the 800 block of Southern Boulevard, a man was on a mission. That mission, a timeless classic, was the procurement of multiple intoxicating beverages. On his mission and seemingly singularly focused, the man walked straight to the beer cooler, selected one 12-pack and one 18-pack and began heading toward the exit. Though an employee suggested that he pay for the beer, the man’s mission it would seem was focused on only the procurement of, not payment for, the beverages. As he left the store with his nearly $40 worth of stolen suds, he was joined by an accomplice who had been outside the store keeping watch. Together, the pair took off running. Did they hop in their get-away car or run to a nearby safehouse? No, they were caught walking down a nearby street in broad daylight with the stolen beer in their hands. Though they claimed they purchased the beer, they had no receipt. The employee, who had had the audacity of suggesting the man pay for the beer, was driven to the location and positively identified the perpetrators. They were both arrested.
Welcome, not welcome: Inviting her ex-boyfriend into her home in the 3300 block of Broadway Avenue, a woman said their reunion turned less-than cordial after she began asking him about the money he owed her. Though originally inviting him inside, the woman decided to formally rescind that invite and told him to leave. He refused. After she called the police, however, he likely took a moment to rethink his refusal and decided it would be in his best interest to seek his entertainment elsewhere. He was gone before officers arrived. She was given information on how to obtain a no-contact order.
Striking home: Crashing into his own garage at his residence in the 1600 block of Brandywine Road, a man was found unconscious in his car with a partially-consumed bottle of vodka tucked under his arm. Though the man opened his eyes, he refused to communicate with police. Transported to the hospital, the man still refused to speak with officers, but would speak with the nurse. His wife informed officers that he had been drinking and that he also had a medical condition. When asked if that condition could have led him to crash into his garage or to him refusing to talk to police she stated “no” and that those afflictions were due to his drinking. He refused to allow a blood draw to determine his possible level of intoxication and was charged with DUI.
Line skipper: Seemingly just one of the many shoppers at a store in the 1700 block of Palm Beach Lakes Boulevard, a man soon showed his true colors. Though he walked around shopping and selecting various pieces of clothing, possibly wondering if this style or that made him seem portly or which colors brought out his eyes, he eventually took his potential purchases to the checkout area and got in line. Though the world will likely never know if he had any intention of actually paying for the items, he then stepped out of line and walked out without paying for the merchandise. He was last seen racing away on his bicycle on North Congress Avenue.
Tackled runner: Wanted on a previous charge, a suspect was spotted in the 700 block of 13th Street. Realizing that the police had seen him and were closing in, the man decided his best option for delaying his possible incarceration was to run down North Sapodilla Avenue. Though fleet of foot the man was apparently a bit clumsy, tripped while running and fell to the ground. Following close behind, officers were able to pin him to the ground and place him in handcuffs. Though he sustained a small laceration to his head during the fall, the man advised that he was more upset that he would not be able to smoke the crack he’d purchased. The crack pipe he’d thrown to the ground during his failed flight was found a short time later. He was arrested.
Hit and runner: Later claiming he didn’t see the other driver, a motorist crashed into another vehicle at the intersection of South Dixie Highway and Pilgrim Road. Rather than check on the other driver to see if they were OK or get his credentials ready for when police arrived, the motorist took off running. Luckily for society, there was a decent person who’d seen the crash and rather than sit back and do nothing, followed the motorist as he ran down the road. The upstanding citizen then informed police of the wayward crasher’s location. Finding the man sitting on the curb, police made contact. With bloodshot, watery eyes and breath reeking of alcohol, the man said he’d consumed eight beers that evening and that he only ran because he didn’t have a driver’s license. Though his stability and balance were compromised by his practically Herculean consumption of alcohol, he agreed to take part in a roadside sobriety test. He did poorly to say the least. While attempting to recite the alphabet he repeated some letters multiple times before mumbling and eventually trailing off without completion. He was arrested for DUI. His breath later showed he was well over two times the legal limit.
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Purse purloiner: Entering a store at a shopping complex in the 3100 block of PGA Boulevard, a woman took a liking to a particular purse. Though liking it, she was apparently not willing to pay the nearly $2,500 price. What to do? What to do? How about tear out the security device, stuff it inside a bag she brought with her and quickly vacate the store and then complex entirely. Winner, winner! The entire incident was captured on surveillance inside the store as well as when the woman walked out of the shopping center with her two friends.
You haven’t been served: Ringing the doorbell at a residence in the 9300 block of Osprey Isles, a county processor got a rather rude welcome. After the doorbell was rung, the processor said he heard a man’s voice inside yell “You messed with the wrong guy tonight.” The ‘guy’ then walked out, shoved the processor and told him to get off the property. The processor, who was there to serve the man’s wife, complied. He then called police to report the incident. Despite the shoving, threat and overall rudeness, he said he was unharmed and did not wish prosecute.
Shopper’s remorse: Shopping at a store in the 2500 block of PGA Boulevard, a woman said she set her purse in her cart and began selecting items. She said she had left the purse open and that at some point her wallet was stolen out of it. She suspects that a woman wearing pink pants was the culprit. She said she also thinks that it happened while she was in the frozen food area picking out some dumplings. The wallet contained her credit and debit cards as well as various credentials and over $300 in cash. She was given a case number and had already begun canceling the cards.
Bad backup plan: Informed that she could not enter a park in the 1300 block of Jupiter Beach Road because it was over capacity, a woman became enraged. She then decided to vent that rage by placing her vehicle in reverse and stomping on the accelerator. Though no doubt the woman wanted to make scene, she succeeded and then some. With her tires squealing she managed to plow into a parked vehicle that still had people inside. Her day now having gone from bad to worse, it was probably entering the terrible zone when she was cited for improper backing and reckless driving. It then turned positively horrible as she was arrested for driving on a suspended license. She was placed in handcuffs and taken to jail.
Wrong-way woes: Driving north in the southbound lanes of Southeast Federal Highway, a motorist was forcing drivers traveling the correct direction to swerve off the road to avoid being struck head on. With a deputy driving parallel to him in the northbound lane, the motorist eventually corrected himself. Despite the deputy’s flashing lights and siren, the directionally-challenged driver continued traveling for approximately two miles before stopping at a business on Southeast Casa Avenue. Though ordered to step out of the car, the driver refused to comply. He did briefly show the deputy his hands before putting them back down, out of sight. With a K9 officer now on scene, the man was in for some hurt as the dog was released and took control of him. He was placed in hand restraints was later arrested for fleeing and eluding. He was then deposited in the county jail.
The wrong question: Seen and heard screaming profanities outside a store in the 1500 block of West Lantana Road, a man was located a short distance away. Still yelling profanities, the man eventually stopped cursing long enough to explain to officers that he was upset about being asked for heroin by another individual. No longer on scene, that individual, apparently, should have known better than to ask him for the drug. The man further explained that his girlfriend had recently died due to using heroin. A records check of the man showed he had an outstanding warrant. He was arrested and later transported to jail.
Soup strife: Though he had a no-trespassing warning in place, a man decided to enter a store in the 100 block of East Lantana Road for the purpose of purchasing and heating up some soup. The manager said the man could make his soup before leaving. Though there was no mention as to why it was taking his soup so long to heat, after 10 minutes the man was told to gather his things and leave. Rather than comply, the man, with a no trespass warning in place, decided that it was time, with police present, to start an argument with the manager, who had shown him some kindness. He was arrested for trespass after warning. Now outside the store, likely never having consumed his soup, the man began tensing up and attempting to escape. He was placed on the ground, searched and then transported to jail.
Compiled by Eddie Ritz from area law enforcement records.
