Husband plans elaborate 30th birthday trip abroad – but not for his wife – The Mirror US
A man has sparked controversy after planning an extravagant birthday trip for his female best friend, leaving his wife out of the equation.
While platonic friendships with the opposite sex can be fulfilling and are entirely possible, it's crucial to maintain respect and boundaries when in a romantic relationship for everyone's wellbeing.
This man was taken aback when his wife expressed her displeasure upon discovering he'd planned an overseas trip with his best friend, leaving her behind. The trip was a fulfillment of a promise he made to his friend, referred to as 'A' in his Reddit post, during their teenage years.
The 30-year-old man and A, now 29, have been friends since they were about 15 or 16. A was a smoker who wanted to quit, aware of "the risks".
In a bid to encourage her, the man made a pact with her. Both being car and motorsport enthusiasts, he promised if she never smoked again, he would take them to her favorite F1 race once they were older and financially stable.
He admitted his 16-year-old self hadn't fully considered the costs, but he still wanted to honor his promise.
He characterized his relationship with A as "sibling like", reiterating his "wife knows that" and emphasizing "nothing has ever happened" between the two. A even played a role in setting him up with his wife, 30, and acted as a "grooms-woman” at their wedding.
The man had saved up for their F1 trip, which he planned around A’s 30th birthday. His wife initially thought the holiday was a "wholesome" idea. He assumed his wife knew and understood that the trip was just going to be for him and A, but she had other expectations. On Reddit's 'AITA' forum, he said: "A couple days ago, my wife mentioned how she's so excited for the trip and I gently let her know that I have only booked two tickets for the race and flights.
"She was upset about this and I was really confused because I thought I had made it clear that this trip was for A and it would just be us two.
"She asked me if I could add another ticket to the race but it's all sold out so l can't really. And then she asked if I could add another plane ticket anyway and I'm not inclined to do that as, and I know this sounds childish, but this was a me and A thing since we made the deal."
Now, his wife is "really upset" and "barely talking" to him. When she recently saw A, she "was very cold towards her".
Reddit users were quick to label him "the a**hole" in the situation. One person said: "Like bro, that's your WIFE. Your supposed #1. Once you were married, the implication should have been she was going on the trip rather than be left out."
Another commented: "This trip should’ve been nixed the moment he got engaged to his wife. It’s not an appropriate trip on any level even if nothing romantic is happening. He made this as a teen. Those promises don’t need to be kept. And in no way do I believe he was clear with [his wife]."
The man later updated his post to say that he had added his wife to their flight and hotel booking. While he acknowledged some of the points made by other Redditors, he maintained his wife should have "said she wanted to come sooner".
He insisted he had "clearly communicated everything with her" and "told her all the details" about the trip.
